Sunday, January 11, 2009

Oh, as usual. Dear.

My, My. Friday night was a blast, as usual. Geraldine started off our evening by shoving a giant piece of sushi in her mouth in time for our waitress at Uni to ask how we were doing. Nothing like trying to talk with jumbo shrimp tempura poking out your lips, eh?

Her reply of "fine" sounded more like "mung." Which in turn, made Kelly nearly spit Diet Coke out of her nose. Me? I didn't manage to embarrass myself until about 2 hours, a strawberry daiquiri, and 2 shots, of what can only be described as a tube of Listerine, later.

Remember those family friendly sitcoms on Friday nights that often ended in a cheesy, heartfelt message of why drinking is bad by showcasing a friend of the family who ended up dancing topless at a frat party or something? That's me. Not the topless part--but the drinking is bad PSA-esque behavior all the same. As I recall, I did molest a straw and yell "victory lap" before spinning my chair around...multiple times.

I should also preface that G did not, in fact, look like Street Walkin' Barbie. Her tube top was much more sophisticated than I had pictured in my head. It went very well with her "Indonesian Emerald" necklace. (It wasn't really...she just kept telling everyone that. Wow, you guys are suckers. Shut up, you are.) Kelly also looked very nice, which might be why we got hit on by E7, Beaufort, and Bobby "the bitch." Kelly also freaked out a table of boys who waved her over, by not only pointing frantically at her wedding ring and screaming "I'm married!" but E felt it necessary to cowboy over and straighten them out.

I never got E's name because when asked it, he gave us his former army rank instead. Beaufort I nicknamed "B" to correspond with Geraldine's "G." And Bobby's just a bitch because B said so. That, and he kept getting into G's bubble. Personal space should still be maintained while drunk. Even if it is your birthday.

By the way, I looked like this
and this and this . Complete with an emo-y self portrait of my makeup. I know the shirt is bright, but I thought tropical rainforest kimono was a good look for me.

You'll be happy to know that I didn't fall down in my sexy heels! You'll also be happy to know that I locked myself in Geraldine's car and had to knock on the window until she and Kelly came to let me out. I suppose I was too busy singing "Just Dance" by Lady Gaga in the backseat to notice them getting out. There was also the knocking over of a drink, the spilling of candle wax trying to reignite the tea light at our table, and I even started a riveting conversation about the word "good" being a subjective term in literature...because I'm a big, fat, smarty pants. I believe it was shortly before or after that point that I gave out this blog address on straw wrappers.

Yes. I pimped out my blog to bar patrons.

So, today's present for reading my blog is the mental image of me swaying back and forth in the backseat to Lady Gaga, repeating the lyrics after they've already been sung line by line. At one point I even shimmied to a laying position on the seat and sprang back up. So here...Just Dance.

Today's subject line quote is from Giles of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997) {Doomed(#4.11)} in honor of Geraldine pointing out 8 deer by the side of the road by very meekly saying "Oh, deer."

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