It's not a crime to be an asshole, but it's very counter-productive.

Things I've done this summer so far:

* Built a corner desk out of shelving material and plastic drawers (total cost: $55)
* Designed a dress for my birthday outing (it's only lacking the hem now)
* Made 2 1/2 purses
* Taught a toddler to stick out his thumbs and say "Aaaayyy" like The Fonz
* Taught the same toddler the alphabet
* Finally decorated my house to near perfection (bedroom is still lacking)
* Won an epic war waged against killer ants invading my house
* Made an extended car trip with a 1 1/2 year old, solo
* Emailed my husband once a day for a month
* Celebrated my 5th wedding anniversary
* Had my cat cremated
* Brainstormed a kickass idea for a teen novel that will never be written
* Had a miniscule mole on my back removed for pretty much no reason at all
* Touched a hissing cockroach at the Insectarium
* Visited the Aquarium
* Perfected my sugar-free chocolate chip cookie recipe
* Had a smoke bomb explode in my hand, turning my fingers hot pink

What have you done?

Today's subject line quote is Ray Embry, "Hancock" (2008).