Friday, January 9, 2009

It's a doll! Step on it! It's over!

My days are filled with decisions. Is it a hazelnut or french vanilla morning? Am I working out or waiting to take a shower at naptime? Is vacuuming really necessary? Most are not-so-important, little questions that will eventually collect in a kharmic pool that I will eventually fish out the big mamma jamma: What am I wearing tonight to make myself prettier than the other girls I'm going out with.

Yep, it's another girl's night out. Just when I was done feeling like drunk over the holidays! Last time I tried not drinking a lot, but I ended up boring the craptoids out of Kelly and Geraldine. We all agree, I'm just going to have to suck it up and drink an gallon of tequila again. Did I tell you guys that there is a cashier at Wal-Mart named "Tequila?" Dead serious. Named in honor of her conception perhaps?

Did I also tell you that during my post-Christmas post the google ad on my page was for a rehab center in Memphis? Awesome. I was given an intervention by my own blog. Not that I need one. Hear me blog? The trash guy outside is not hoisting a can of bottles into his truck. It's equal parts diapers and dog hair as well.

Back to the matter at hand. I am going to be the hottness tonight. I've declared it, make it so. After a depressing realization that Geraldine bought a hot pink tube top to wear out tonight, I realized that my tank top and cardigan combo I was planning on wearing wasn't in the same league. It'd be like Streetwalkin' Barbie going out with Librarian Barbie. They'd both be hot, but Librarian Barbie's buying her own drinks.

After finding the most vibrant, sexy shirt I could find in the Express sale bin, I've figured out my look for the evening. I'm gonna do emo/punk scene hair and makeup. Kinda like this...
with some sort of stylish hairdo that is yet to be determined. But knowing me, it will turn out more like this...


Wish me luck! And because this shit is bananas, you're all getting a Gwen Stefani fashion doll collection today.



The subject line quote is from Dee Snider on "I love the 80's" (2002).

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