The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.

My patience isn't fabulous.  I'm not even one of those people who can do Christmas shopping early because I will immediately contact that person with, "LOOK WHAT I JUST GOT YOU!! ISN'T IT GREAT??"  So I usually buy everything online the week of and have it shipped directly.  So the fact that I have so many things up in the air right now, is a little excruciating. 

So many loose ends with school are keeping me up at night.  Plus the final details of my financial situation via the divorce is stressing me out.  They go hand-in-hand because if I can't afford to go to school...then I can't...you know, go to school.  And if I can't go to school, I'll be stuck in a dead end career.  My life will forever be asking if people need to make appointments and making less moulah than people who ask if they want fries with that. Which I've done, it's hard and shitty.  I'm doing far less physical labor now, but my skill set is more refined. 

And dating is fine line between being adorable and annoying to someone and I'm not sure how to balance that tightrope.  That's all I'm going to say about that particular topic.

Basically, send me things to distract me.  I need memes!  Tell me funny stories about your life.  What's something you've found entertaining in the last week or so?  Anything so that I don't dwell on the things that are on my mind right now. 

Today's subject line quote is from Leo Tolstoy.

There's many a man has hair than wit.

Most of you all know I like to reinvent my look every few months.  It keeps me interested in life.  A good portion of the time it's hair color.  I've been described as Tonks from Harry Potter because my hair is like a cheap, 90's mood ring.    I've had every hair color there is, even green (thanks to the bleaching process after my blue-galaxy inspired 'do).  It was sort of rainbow after that.  It looked like a unicorn wretched on my locks.  

Lately, I've been sporting a blackish hue.  I'm already over it.  Honestly, I'm tired of my hair alltogether.  I had the WORST haircut experience months ago and it's still growing out from that butchery.  I looked longingly at Cersei Lannister's hair cut in Game of Thrones after this disaster.  I have dreams about my hair being long again.  They are so comforting, like a warm hug.  I miss my long hair so much!  Here's a picture of how hot I was:

Sometimes I wake up from those dreams all excited to style my lushious hair and then look in the mirror and just sigh heavily.  This is taking FOR...EEEVVV.....EEERRR.  I feel like I'm in hair purgatory. 

Today's subject line quote is from William Shakespeare.

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”

I get stressed easily.  On the outside, I think I handle it super well.  On the inside?  I'm Michael Bay caliber explosions.  The worst is that I'm also spoiled so there's really no reason for me to even get stressed in the first place.  My life is coming together in a way I never felt possible while the people I love around me are struggling and it makes me realize how petty I can be. 

In the wake of the Puerto Rico and Las Vegas tragedies, I feel like I should be doing more to give back.  I've been skating by in my community.  Thoughts and prayers aren't going to help but I don't have the funds to donate at the moment.  I suppose I shouldn't feel too detached because I have given two small loans to friends in the last 6 months.  But I do.  I feel like I need to do more than just share memes and infographics on social media.  But how do I be more proactive?  How do I make a difference? 

My time is precious and it's about to become even more scarce as I embark on these new pathways.  So how do people do it?  How are there such truly great people in this world?  How can I be one?  I think my grace period of "You've got a lot going on right now." is coming to an end.  Why is this even bothering me so much?  I just feel like a really terrible person for having my shit together finally.

Today's subject line quote is from Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Here's the thing: Chilis is the new golf course. It's where the business happens.

Ever have a time in your life when everything just falls into place and feels so completely right that your organs could just burst from the inside out spewing happiness and rainbows all over the unsuspecting masses of seemingly depressed people because they obviously have less joy in their life than you do right now?  No?  Just me then? 

I've honestly never had that feeling either--before now.  I typically get the slightest tingle of happy in my bones and I freak the fuck out and make up some sort of psuedo crisis.  I go looking for drama.  Drama is my cozy blanket and cup of coffee on a rainy day.  So have I now grown up enough to embrace the delightfulness?  Move over chaos!  Stability is the new sherrif in town.

Granted, I get this sort of euphoria every Fall.  The suburban, yoga-pant wearing, white girl in me can't help but squeal when pumpkin spice flavored scarves come back into fashion.  October makes me giddy in the way that my two-year-old lights up when she sees...pretty much anything.  She's typically the most genuinely happy kid on the planet.  But you should have seen us at the county fair.  I freakin' LOVE goats!  I will talk to them for hours because they make the best sounds.  It's simply another beautiful aspect of my Autumnal love of life.  But this feels a little more substantial than a Fall tease.

For those of you following along at home, my cosmotology school tour went really well.  I think I might actually do this!  There's one catch...I'll have to put roller derby on the backburner for about a year.  I can still be involved in the league, but practices aren't in the cards.  I'll be too busy learning to do perms for old ladies and ombres for basic bitches.  I have two weeks to decide, get my work on board with me going part-time, convincing my nanny and kids that this is going to be a similar schedule change, and work out my budget so that I can still feed my morning latte addiction.

And for those of you waiting for a date update, I never made it to Ikea.  I was so excited to get to Modesto that I skipped the stop in Palo Alto and went straight over.  I'm not going to divulge many details because there's a .0098% chance he's going to read this and then freak out that I want to turn us into a modern day Brady Bunch.  But, we had the best time ever.com.  That's an inside joke.  We have those.  Jealous?  Also, our song is "Angry White Boy Polka" by Weird Al.  Super Jealous?  You know you are.

Today's subject line quote is from The Office, Season 2: Episode 7, "The Client."