Thursday, February 19, 2009

It's like going to heaven and finding God smoking crack.

Why do I have to microwave my enchilada at 50% power for 8 minutes? Couldn't I just nuke the sucker full on for 4? Raise your hand if that sounds like a better plan than doubling my hunger in that precious 4 minutes. If you don't raise your hand, I'm going to eat it instead. Mmm, tasty appendages for everyone!

Doesn't matter how long I try to kill my frozen enchilada with radiation; it will come out at magma levels of hot and I will end up waiting another 10 minutes for it cool enough to not melt my mouth into a puddle of tongue on the floor. But I won't, so cheers to the lost ability to speak clearly.

For those of you wondering why I'm eating an enchilada and not the usual coffee and imaginary bacon and eggs breakfast, get with it. It's noon. I broke morning protocol of baby-highchair, coffee, blog to get ready for yoga class. It's at the worst possible time for me, 9 a.m. That actually translates to 8:45 in mommy-drop- off-the-kid-in-childcare time. And if you factor in my morning scramble to pack a bag and wrestle a toddler into clothing, we're really looking at a process that begins sometime around 7 p.m the night before.

So is it worth it--all the downward dog, ass in the air, stretching into a pretzel time? No. I go for the last 5 minutes of the hour long class. I go for total body relaxation power nap time. Yes, I will put my body into unnatural, hard poses to maneuver in (and out) of for a chance to go completely limp on the floor in near darkness. It's heavenly.

And all the yoga moves make it that much more superb to just lay down and die a little, but in a good way. The instructor came through and did a cool move with everybody too. She took my feet and and swung my legs side to side to loosen up my hips and back. Then, she came around and massaged the back of my skull. It was the most relaxing moment I have experienced in ages. I know, I'm 24 and I shouldn't be allowed to use the term "ages" yet. But I speak truth!

Now I want to go spread joy to the world by telling them to lie on their back and swinging their feet for them! Go ahead, I'll be right over.

Here's a gift while you wait for me to show up.

P.S. I kinda felt like this during the class.

Today's subject line quote is Riley, "The Boon Docks" (2005) {The Story of Gangstalicious (#1.6)}.

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