Monday, December 8, 2008

NORMAL? Some boring, old, normal, old, toilet goer, huh?

I'm suffering a blog famine of sorts. Material for this page usually presents itself, and often. I don't usually have normal, boring days like the average American. My days are frequently filled with odd encounters that I must immediately share with you. Like this one:

Wal-Mart is piping in pure Cassidy quality insanity fuel through their P.A. system. There is nothing I want to hear less while battling the mobs for the last gallon of milk than Christmas music. Unless it's Beyonce singing Christmas music in her gospel vibrato--which it was. I was so distracted by it that I physically bumped into an old lady last week. She's too old to be in the demographic that I'm currently holding a vendetta against though, so I felt bad. This granny was the so old I don't give a flying monkey fart what people think--therefore I will be surprisingly fun old. Which is why when I bumped into her and excused myself she said this, "Boy, I bet I could sing that better than she could."

Right on, old lady. Right on.

Other than that tidbit? I got nothin'. I've been having a fairly nondramatic week of nonbloggables. "Nonbloggables" are just moments in time that even I can't make seem interesting. Where's all my drama at? If you're a loyal reader and want this blog to continue, please donate a topic and/or story that I can reenact for the betterment of the internet.

Otherwise, you're just going to read my bitching about because they failed to tell me that my niece's birthday present was backordered until yesterday. Her birthday was a month ago. I ordered it October 23. Then the D-bag decides to respond to my nasty email with "That tends to happen during the holidays." Really, the "holidays" include Halloween now? Is that when the hysteria and incompetence can officially start now? I'll mark it down.

Well, crap. That was it. That was all the bitching I had saved up for future blogs! Seriously, comment, email me, message me on myspace or facebook, anything!

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