My first high school reunion is in 8 days and I'm coasting on the surrealism of knowing this. What's even stranger than waking up and realizing that 10 years has flown by and I've done practically nothing but get fat? That I'm actually going.
Hopping on a plane Tuesday morning to exchange the farmers markets and fresh air of sunny California for the bible belt, chicken farms, and a party being held at a Cherokee casino. And I've obsessed over this for the past year! I didn't want the first thing people to think when they saw me was Oh my God! Someone ate Cassidy and is wearing her skin like an Edgar-suit from Men In Black!
That got me started on P90X and Weight Watchers again. It lasted about 6 weeks because both of those are like a part-time job! Who has time to work out 1-2 hours EVERY DAY for a month and a half? Oh sure, let me calculate points for the tenth of a marshmallow I just licked off the counter as well! I'm doing all this between raising 2 kids that need attention 26 hours a day, meal planning, cleaning, and trying to socialize with other moms who are too busy to hang out...you know so have those things that people need...friends??
Also, I started a internet-crafting boutique so that I wouldn't just be a stay-at-home mom who quit working out so she could both eat AND sleep every day. Turns out, I pay Etsy to put up fancy words and pictures of crappy purses that nobody wants to buy. Boy! That'll show the class of 2002 how much I'm not a loser.
But I'm sure everybody feels insecure about what they've done with their lives thus far, right? Except the popular kids that look just has hot as they did a decade ago. But they probably made some kind of deal with Satan back in middle school. And lets face it...that was hella smart. But back to me. I shouldn't have anything to be ashamed of or worried about. Here's why:
I married the perfect person in the universe, or even multiple universes, who could put up with me and could make me as happy as I am. I did so when I wanted to, even though it was hard and it made us broke for about 5 years. Despite that we moved across the country after my sophomore year, I still finished college. We got out of debt. We bought a house. Then I CHOSE to be a mom and one that put her kids above anything else. I wanted to be with my kids more than I wanted a career. And now we've lived on every coast of the US, vacationed in Europe and Mexico (or will by this Christmas...Holla!), and STAYED married for 8 1/2 years and been in love for 1 0 even though I gained 120 lbs since high school. My husband supported me financially and emotionally as I, literally, worked my gigantic ass off to lose 100 of it. My hips are wider because I had a baby the size of a Buick, but he's the smartest and coolest preschooler in the nation. I am happy to sacrifice my body to give that gift to the world.
I am not who I was in high school; I'm better. But I do have bat wings.
Today's subject line quote is from My Name is Earl (2007) "The Gangs of Camden County."
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I know that feel. All of that feel!
ReplyDeleteWell our 10 year did not happen due to the storm whose name will not be spoken. And considering that 2 weeks before I graduated we had the 100 year flood I have an idea what our 20th should hold when it rolls around in 3 years. I am thinking we need to have it on an ark. Anyway, living in a small town we have a reunion every major event at the local schools so I can only tell you that when I run into people visiting here that left it doesn't matter what they look like. I am just happy to catch up. (Unless they were on of the truly snotty people and now look 20 yrs older than they are then I am filled with glee)
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