Thursday, May 31, 2012

You think you know pain? He will make you long for something as sweet as pain.

     I believe my body is deteriorating at a rapid and exponential rate.  Since we moved to California (in early March), I have:  fallen out of my front door and sprained my ankle (CA, week 2 by the way), experienced "headache season"--to which my doctor described as allergies that trigger migraines so I have to remember to take a decongestant before it creeps up on me (or sit in the fetal position and moan for the several hours it takes to dissipate, gotten my first ingrown toenail that Dom had to perform home-surgery with a pair of tweezers and some cotton twice daily for a week, grabbed my curling iron by the barrel and received a 2039849384 degree burn on my middle and index finger (the same week as the toenail debacle), we started working out to P90X and my muscles want to physically leave my body due to abuse--but that's another whole blog in itself, and finally the impacted wisdom teeth I've been avoiding having removed since 2005 finally started trying to break through my gums with what I can only assume is razor-coated enamel.

     I had the right half of my wisdom teeth removed a little over 7 years ago.  I made the mistake of using a general dentist and I'm fairly certain he wanted to embody Steve Martin's character in Little Shop of Horrors.  It was the most painful experience of my entire life, up to that point.  Crazy Pitocin labor wins that trophy, but having your teeth and jawbone removed under local anesthetic by a Dr. Sadist, D.D.S was a close second.

     So after having 3 or so more dentists remind me that the left half had to go soon, "And you don't want to wait until your 25 or older, that's not going to be good for you. Blah Blah Blah.  Pain.  Damage.  Etc."  I'm turning 28 this summer and still have the boogers!  It wasn't all fear that kept me from the extraction.  There were several other factors, like laziness.
     Also, there were no oral surgeons (within 100 miles) covered under my insurance while living in South Carolina.  And when we moved to Slidouche, my husband was gone 40% of the year and I didn't want to have to play single parent directly after having someone cut open my gums and rip out my giant, sideways teeth.  Then when he was home for an extended time, Dom needed surgery twice.  And then I decided to have somebody cut me open and extract a baby instead.

     Long story--still pretty long but I'll cut to the chase,  I had a consultation this week.  My oral surgeon is very experienced.  And by that, I mean older than Jesus.  But at this point, I'm not going to go hunting for a new guy and possibly pay out of pocket for a fresher face just because I'm age discriminant.  Though, he did tell me that the root of my lower tooth is scraping the central nerve and there's a possibility that the left side of my face could be permanently numb.  Now I'm just hoping that his geriatric, Parkinson's hands are steady enough to not break my face.

     His office is also booked up through the first week of July, so I get to obsess about this until Friday the 6th.  Yaaaaaay.  I'm going to go eat breakfast while I can still taste it with the left side of my tongue...

Today's Subject Line Quote is from The Avengers (2012).


  1. Oh the joys of Cassidy, how I miss you (and hearing all the things that happen to you)!

  2. Hang in there lady, this too will be OK. We both miss you and can't wait to have another get together!

  3. I'm shamelessly age discriminant about my OBs, but I'm totally okay with an old oral long as he has a steady hand and doesn't smell like liquor. But I maintain those last two criteria for surgeons of all ages, not just the old ones.

    We'll be thinking about you, and get well soon in advance!

  4. least he is younger than Love and miss you guys.



Follow me. I might lead you somewhere you haven't been.